"Get a grip!"

One day when my sons were little, we were catching a quick bite to eat at some fast food joint.  We were short on time as I had to get them to a class, but I had us go inside to eat rather than just eating in the car as an opportunity for us to at least relax a little.  At one point though, I just had to get us back in the car and on our way.  

My son Christopher was not quite done with his french fries and was NOT happy to be rushed out the door before he was done eating.  But he came grumbling along and got in the car in the seat behind me.  The car we had at the time did not have electric locks and so you had to pull a pin up manually on the door to unlock it.  I could not reach it very easily from the front seat, so I asked him to get the door on the other side for his brother to get in.  As I said, we were in a hurry, so when his french-fry-oily hands slipped all over the lock mechanism and he couldn’t get it up, he got even more upset.  I kind of rolled my eyes and sighed and said “Get a grip, Christopher,” and reached to get the lock (not easy now that he’d greased it up good, but much easier for my clean hands than his).  

As I did this it hit me how funny it was that I was telling him to get a grip on his attitude when he was also struggling with the grip on the lock mechanism and as I returned to a proper sitting position I started to laugh.  It tickled my funny bone so much I couldn’t stop!  I was laughing so hard I was crying.  Christopher was not amused at first, even when I explained why I was laughing, but we were all laughing by the time we got to the place where they had class.

I haven’t thought of this in a while, and Christopher may not have either, but I’ll be sure to get him to read this post!  He’s in Iraq today, serving our country.  I often pray that he’ll have something each day that can bring him a smile, or laughter.  He’s in a very serious job in a very serious place and laughter can seem far away during such times.  But I believe that even in the most difficult situations we can keep our peaceful centers and find love and laughter. 

I recently heard a woman pose the question, “Is it a problem, or an inconvenience?”  I really pondered that question, which is quite subjective.  But if you really think about it, there is almost nothing that can’t be solved or overcome, and even the bleakest situations are just what is happening now and does not define who you are.  Each of us has the power to choose who and how we want to be at any given moment.  We can be the light in the darkness, the seed of faith in a seemingly hopeless situation, and the instrument through which the answer comes ... if we choose to be.  

Is being poor a problem, or an inconvenience?  Is being disabled a problem, or an inconvenience?  Is losing a job a problem, or an inconvenience?  Each of us have to answer these questions for ourselves, but if we open to solutions and use our ingenuity there is virtually nothing that cannot be overcome.  I don’t mean that the issue will necessarily go away, but rather, that we can find our way to live and thrive despite its presence in our lives.  

So my son can find ways to be happy and laugh in Iraq.  Someone experiencing financial issues can be happy despite the “money trouble.”  Someone with a disability can enjoy life despite their physical or mental limitations.  Jobs can be found.  And it is our individual choice to go through these situations with or without a positive attitude.  

So, Christopher, I hope you are finding ways to “get a grip” and “lighten up” over there.  And I hope that each of you are finding ways to your peace even when problems and inconveniences come to challenge it.

Namasté,

CJ