Believing Versus Knowing

One thing that I discover over and over as I coach people on life issues is that at the bottom of a great deal of their challenges is a lack of faith in something.  

You see, there is a huge, yet subtle, difference between "believing" and "knowing" that something is true.  We can even convince ourselves that our beliefs are knowings, even when this is not so.  You see, our minds can believe something, while our hearts do not.  There has actually been a considerable amount of research done on this that indicates the existence of what has come to be known as the heart-brain (see www.heartmath.org).  This research actually indicates that the heart-brain is "stronger" than the brain we have all been told controls our choices, beliefs and actions.

Learning to differentiate between beliefs and knowings, and between what our head and our heart are telling us are some of the basic logistics we humans need in order to live deliberate, conscious lives.  A further look into the heart-brain suggests that it knows things that our logical brain does not recognize.  That these things the heart-brain picks up on are connected to our souls and to the whole web of life.  Research also indicates that our hearts can and do veto decisions of the logical brain and may even be the true driving force of our lives.  It would seem then a good idea to get more in touch with our heart-brain so that we make optimal life choices.  Coaching is one of many tools that can help with this process.  

I'd like to give you one small exercise you can do to help with these differentiations.  I'm sure you can feel the difference already, even as you read the first lines of this post.  But here, I want you to try this little experiment:

Say out loud:  "I believe I am worthy of living an abundant life."

Then pause and try to see how that statement made you feel.

Then say out loud:  "I know I am worthy of living an abundant life."

Again, check in with how you feel.

Can you feel the emotions each statement creates within your body?  Can you feel any difference in how you feel when you state the two sentences?  

One way to find out how much you truly resonate with something in your life is to try these two statements on the topic you are wondering about.  For instance:

"I believe I am __________."

"I know I am ___________."

If you feel strong, positive emotion with a statement, you know you are good to go.  If you waffle, feel agitated or any other negative emotion in your feeling center when you state the statements, then you know you have work to do.  And perhaps you'll get clarity about where you stand on the issue even more if you get the negative emotion on both statements.  If you get the negative emotion when you say "I believe ...," then you know you aren't anywhere near where you want to be.  If you get the negative emotion when you say "I know ...", but not when you say "I believe...," then you know you at least believe, but you need to fine tune yourself to knowing.

It could just be a slight pivot you need to take, or you may have a series of shifts to move through.  Never fear, for no journey is impossible ... 

... if you have a little faith. 

In Joy,

CJ

"Get a grip!"

One day when my sons were little, we were catching a quick bite to eat at some fast food joint.  We were short on time as I had to get them to a class, but I had us go inside to eat rather than just eating in the car as an opportunity for us to at least relax a little.  At one point though, I just had to get us back in the car and on our way.  

My son Christopher was not quite done with his french fries and was NOT happy to be rushed out the door before he was done eating.  But he came grumbling along and got in the car in the seat behind me.  The car we had at the time did not have electric locks and so you had to pull a pin up manually on the door to unlock it.  I could not reach it very easily from the front seat, so I asked him to get the door on the other side for his brother to get in.  As I said, we were in a hurry, so when his french-fry-oily hands slipped all over the lock mechanism and he couldn’t get it up, he got even more upset.  I kind of rolled my eyes and sighed and said “Get a grip, Christopher,” and reached to get the lock (not easy now that he’d greased it up good, but much easier for my clean hands than his).  

As I did this it hit me how funny it was that I was telling him to get a grip on his attitude when he was also struggling with the grip on the lock mechanism and as I returned to a proper sitting position I started to laugh.  It tickled my funny bone so much I couldn’t stop!  I was laughing so hard I was crying.  Christopher was not amused at first, even when I explained why I was laughing, but we were all laughing by the time we got to the place where they had class.

I haven’t thought of this in a while, and Christopher may not have either, but I’ll be sure to get him to read this post!  He’s in Iraq today, serving our country.  I often pray that he’ll have something each day that can bring him a smile, or laughter.  He’s in a very serious job in a very serious place and laughter can seem far away during such times.  But I believe that even in the most difficult situations we can keep our peaceful centers and find love and laughter. 

I recently heard a woman pose the question, “Is it a problem, or an inconvenience?”  I really pondered that question, which is quite subjective.  But if you really think about it, there is almost nothing that can’t be solved or overcome, and even the bleakest situations are just what is happening now and does not define who you are.  Each of us has the power to choose who and how we want to be at any given moment.  We can be the light in the darkness, the seed of faith in a seemingly hopeless situation, and the instrument through which the answer comes ... if we choose to be.  

Is being poor a problem, or an inconvenience?  Is being disabled a problem, or an inconvenience?  Is losing a job a problem, or an inconvenience?  Each of us have to answer these questions for ourselves, but if we open to solutions and use our ingenuity there is virtually nothing that cannot be overcome.  I don’t mean that the issue will necessarily go away, but rather, that we can find our way to live and thrive despite its presence in our lives.  

So my son can find ways to be happy and laugh in Iraq.  Someone experiencing financial issues can be happy despite the “money trouble.”  Someone with a disability can enjoy life despite their physical or mental limitations.  Jobs can be found.  And it is our individual choice to go through these situations with or without a positive attitude.  

So, Christopher, I hope you are finding ways to “get a grip” and “lighten up” over there.  And I hope that each of you are finding ways to your peace even when problems and inconveniences come to challenge it.

Namasté,

CJ

"We're Beyond Hope"

What do you feel when you hear the phrase “beyond hope.”  I’ll bet it isn’t a very good feeling.  In our world today, this phrase has quite a negative connotation.  It means something is hopeless, helpless, that there is NO chance of saving the situation, whatever it may be.  

But let me tell you a story.  I was traveling with two of my sons and a friend from Kansas City to southern Minnesota to drop off my sons at a summer camp that I had attended as a kid.  We were talking and laughing and singing songs while I drove and my friend navigated.  At one point, after a particularly jovial stretch of time, a shot of guilty anxiety swept through me as I realized we had been so engrossed in our fun that we hadn’t paid very close attention to our journey in quite a while and I felt we must be very close to, or even passed, our exit.  The sobering thought caused me to kind of hold my breath as I asked my friend where we were.  She consulted the map (not any signs) and quickly replied, “I think we are near Hope” (which happens to be the name of a town in southern Minnesota.  It just so happened that I had actually seen the city sign for Hope some time previously and so I just as quickly responded, “No, we are beyond Hope,” to which there was a brief pause of silence in the car before we all burst into raucous laughter once again!

(An additional note of humor I’ll add is that as we were enjoying this newest burst of laughter, my youngest son said, “I don’t know why I’m laughing, but this sure is fun!,” to which we all, of course, dissolved into fits of laughter yet again!)

Now seriously (no, I take that back ... laugh all you want before continuing to read this), I would like to offer a new perspective to you.  Let’s think for a moment about the levels of emotion.  If you haven’t seen the Emotional Scale offered by Abraham-Hicks, I’m including it as a tool in the right hand tool bar of this blog (scroll down and find it underneath my bio).  If you’ll please note where HOPEFULNESS is positioned on the Emotional Scale, you’ll notice that there are a number of emotions that are beyond hope.  In this case I am referring to those emotions that reside above Hope on the scale ... Optimism, Positive Expectation, Belief, Enthusiasm, Eagerness, Happiness, Passion, Joy, Knowledge, Empowerment, Freedom, Love and Appreciation.  

Could we, perhaps, create a new paradigm and turn this phrase, beyond hope, on its ear?  Could we dare to conceive that there IS no such thing as hopelessness in the Real World ... that hopelessness is a figment of our imagination, a word cooked up as a substitute for such things as:

Not knowing how the universe can deliver the miracle we are seeking

Not believing in the abilities or reliability of the Unseen Loving Forces that surround us

Not believing in ourselves, our dreams, our worthiness

???

And if there is no such thing as hopelessness, there is no need for such a word, or concept, as hopefulness, for it you could never experience hopelessness there would never be the experience of “finding hope” or hopefulness.  One would simply move from  Contentment to Optimism.  Could we, perhaps, collaborate on a scheme to replace this phrase’s current meaning with a new one that offers people ... optimism?  

Tell me, are you beyond hope?  Have you been striving to raise yourself above the feeling of hopefulness to believing, or knowing?  Have you made it a habit to reach for the emotions that are higher vibrational signatures than hopefulness?  Can you see the potential that lies in wait for you if you will allow yourself to contemplate reaching beyond hope for a better-feeling thought and a higher-vibrational emotion as you move along your path of your life journey?

Well, you may not be laughing all the way as we were that day so many years ago, but I’ll bet you’ll find greater happiness around every corner if you move beyond hope each step of your journey.

R.E.A.C.H. (Rise Energetically And Clasp Heaven),

CJ

A Twittle Manifestation

A couple of weeks ago I noticed the first birds flying in V-formation in the skies up here.  In Minnesota, March is sometimes unpredictable weather, so when you see the birds you know that winter is coming to an end soon.  They know you know.  Funny how we trust the instincts in nature, but not our own ... and we are a part of nature, too.  Huh.

Anyway, that isn't what I was going to tell you.  When I saw them in the sky that first day, my heart leapt for joy and I remember my thought was, "Yay!  My ears will get to hear birdsong again!"  And then as the days went by and I heard all the different songs outside my windows (I'm hearing them right now!) I had memories of delicious bird experiences in my past ... the time I was in the woods and a Great Horned Owl landed on a tree about 20 feet away from me, turned its head and gazed at me for about 2 minutes while I stood frozen and transfixed; the first time I heard a Meadowlark, perhaps the sweetest sound I've ever heard; and the seagull who kept bowing to me (for me) in Duluth last summer (I am including his picture so you'll believe me).  And the thoughts continued, and tumbled, and fed my soul and made me happy.

A few days ago I was driving and the thoughts were there again, making me happy, and I had a new memory ... of a morning when the window over my bed was open and the Spring breeze was delectable, and a bird was singing just feet from my head.  My heart had swelled with joy!  And as the memory trickled through my being, I felt a rocket of desire launch ... that I would have the kind of life where I awaken to birdsong instead of an alarm clock.

And as of yesterday, it seems this lifestyle is here!!  I set my alarm clock both mornings not wanting my fatigue to keep me sleeping too far into the morning.  Both mornings birdsong woke me about 10 minutes before the alarm was set to go off!  What a delicious way to start the day!

Here’s to Spring and the return of the birds!

CJ